Speaker 1: 0:03

Welcome to Grace Among Us, the podcast where we unearth the many faces and places of grace and share stories of the power of grace in our human lives. Our desire is that this will inspire you to see grace in your own life and share it with others.

Ebony Gilbert: 0:22

My name is Ebony Gilbert and I get to work alongside Carri Richard to talk about Grace Among Us, and it is about to be a new year, so I'm excited to be here with you today. And, Carri, who are you?

Carri Richard: 0:41

Ebony Gilbert. I am Carri Richard. I'm a mindset coach. I help people make space and enjoy the ride, and this is my very favorite topic and one of my very favorite people I get to speak to about grace. So yeah, it is almost a new year and actually, when this comes out, it may even be the new year.

Ebony Gilbert: 1:11

So, Merry Christmas, Happy New Year.

Carri Richard: 1:14

Yes, Merry Christmas. Happy New Year, here's to an amazing Grace-filled 2024.

Ebony Gilbert: 1:23

And here's to an amazing 2023 that blew my mind.

Carri Richard: 1:28

It did, (Ebony - it did). Yeah, give me something that blew your mind.

Ebony Gilbert: 1:39

Personal growth. Personal growth I think you and I were talking yesterday a little bit about. I was telling you that some of the things you asked me how was work and how was life I was saying how some of the same things I've been going through in the last two weeks, some of the same situations I've been encountering. If I had encountered those situations a year earlier or two years earlier I probably would have reacted very differently. But now I can laugh at them, now I can kind of literally let it roll off my shoulders and for that type of peace I can call it growth, I can use a bunch of self-help words. But for that kind of peace to just organically flow. I'm not having to channel it, I'm not having to take a pause and go oh, act in grace. I'm living in it in a way that feels very natural. That is mind blowing to me. And even the things that do get next to me, I'm not losing sleep over it and I'm a lot less judgmental internally because I would never voice those things. But now I don't even think them. My mindset about some things are a bit different. So for growth, the growth, the peace, the grace, and I'd be silly to not attribute some of that to what we're doing here.

Ebony Gilbert: 3:19

I'm talking about it on a regular cadence. I'm not waiting for an opportunity to present itself and then I'll get my cup filled randomly at the gas station, if somebody asked me. No, this is very intentional and it's like watering, it's an irrigation system. This podcast has been a grace irrigation system and it comes on with a timer and it waters the seed and it keeps me positive and it keeps presenting in a way that my peace is growing and my relationship with God is growing and is getting me to a point where I'm proud to say I'm a child of the King and I'm representing Him in a way that's not forced and I'm excited about how that looks in '24, because '23 felt exponential to me. So I don't even know what to imagine for '24. I'm not talking about promotions. I'm not talking about things. I bought those trips, I went on, those things were great. I'm talking about the internal condition of my heart and soul.

Carri Richard: 4:21

It's just a good place. I love him, I love him.

Ebony Gilbert: 4:25

That was a long answer.

Carri Richard: 4:26

It was a beautiful answer and I, to be honest, I was like man. She took mine.

Ebony Gilbert: 4:34

Well, let's hear it in Carrie's words oh my God.

Carri Richard: 4:38

OK, I give up judging my own words against yours. Yeah, that, that peace that surpasses all understanding and access to it. And I, what I heard you say was, you know, I didn't have to work, not work for it, but it wasn't an effort. It's become like a more regular - just part of life. There's that concept of things becoming second nature, like I don't think about how I brush my teeth, I don't think about how I put my shoes on, I don't think about how I, you know, step out of bed or if I'm walking up and down stairs, things like that. And you know, these sweet little brains and minds, like we talk to it with repetition, it understands repetition. So, to your point, being willing to continue to have grace as a major focus, it I don't think it's. I think it's impossible not to live like, begin to live more into grace. I have a dear friend who says it's just walking further into the kingdom and that just brings me so much joy to think about that. So, yes, to your point.

Carri Richard: 6:09

There are things that occurred this year. You know - the word I had for this year was freedom. I had no idea what I was going to be freed from, and there were situations that were highly uncomfortable and in the past, I probably would want to go hide in the corner for a while and lick my wounds right and, by God's grace, there were different solutions. It's almost like those grace glasses go on and things get right sized. Or my perception is different, and that's not to say that I didn't cry, I didn't get angry, I didn't have all the feelings. This isn't a bandaid, but it's, oh my gosh, I can't, I am amazed. I can walk through this with grace and it just, you know, it inspires me to keep, keep, keep practicing, because, to your point, who knows what 2024 is going to look like?

Ebony Gilbert: 7:23

Yeah, yeah, so I can be excited about 24. I'm also a little I don't want to use the word anxious, but a little anxious, Because I know every round goes a little bit higher and once you went through this time prepares you for the next time. So and there's continued growth. Like you don't just stop growing, We're not going to get stagnant. So I know the next mountain to be a little higher, I know the next thing to be a little bigger, and that gives me a little bit of anxiety. But I feel so equipped and that which I don't have, I know I will when I need it, and I have so much confidence in that.

Carri Richard: 8:00

I love that word equipped and to your point, I may, I may not, I am not, most likely, I am not equipped for something that's going to happen in February, and I don't need to be, (Ebony - because February is not now). Exactly, exactly. There's a there's like a buzz statement that goes around the "inner webs, you know, new level. It's new level, new devil Devils, and I think I don't, I, you know, that's what I hear when you're speaking about that.

Ebony Gilbert: 8:33

Yeah, and I'm okay with that.

Carri Richard: 8:36

Yeah, you know what excites me about that. And I get the anxiety. I'm not saying I'm all gung-ho like, bring it on, bring it on. Although I am a little bit. What excites me about that is I know what it feels like to walk through it and get to the other side of something like that.

Carri Richard: 8:58

And so when I am in the middle, in the hall walking through it, sometimes it's just reflecting back on a time when I've come through something really difficult and trying to touch us for a minute, to touch in on that, that feeling of you know sometimes, sometimes popping out the other side Like it's, like, holy crap, you wake up the next day and it's like, oh my gosh, I'm on the other side, (Ebony - I made it!) Exactly and I couldn't have made it any faster.

Ebony Gilbert: 9:36

I don't know. I'm on time.

Carri Richard: 9:38

Exactly, and I have no control over that time.

Ebony Gilbert: 9:43

Yeah, I like what you said being able to look back and say, hey, I made it through before. Yeah, I can do it again.

Carri Richard: 9:54

You know what? I'm 100% successful in making it through.

Ebony Gilbert: 10:01

How about that for statistics? Those are good odds. That is an amazing batting average.

Carri Richard: 10:07

Yeah, because here we are, Say that again. That kind of that felt good. I am 100% successful at making it through difficult situations.

Ebony Gilbert: 10:23

There was no failing.

Carri Richard: 10:25

No, because I'm sitting here. I got my coffee, actually it's water. Now I've got my water. I'm talking to a dear friend, I'm breathing, it's warm in here. I have all I need in this moment. That means I'm 100% successful.

Ebony Gilbert: 10:50

That is. That's not just good perspective. That's fact. That's not fru fru"or through. That is truth. And for all the scientific folks who struggle with reconciling the stuff with the stuff that satisfies both.

Carri Richard: 11:15

There is a scripture and I can't access it right now.

Ebony Gilbert: 11:23

I'm going to paraphrase it and see if you can access it.

Carri Richard: 11:26

It's not a test. Just to say I think it was Paul talking about the power of just being content with what we have. That's not a lot to go on.

Ebony Gilbert: 11:44

To be abound and abased. To be that - you're talking about that one.

Speaker 1: 11:51

It's.

Ebony Gilbert: 11:52

It's Philippians Okay, Philippians 4th chapter, and Paul's talking about. He's in jail, basically, and his friends hadn't come to see him and he's - am I passing the test? And he's talking about. You know, I've learned to be content in whatever circumstances I'm in. Yes, is that what you're hitting on? That's it, and we'll reference it in the notes.

Carri Richard: 12:13

Yeah.

Ebony Gilbert: 12:14

That's the chapter.

Carri Richard: 12:16

That chapter 4 is a really good chapter. If you were just to read one chapter for the next month, read that.

Ebony Gilbert: 12:27

Yes, I've learned to have and have not. I've learned to be in need and not. You know it's that. And he ends it with no matter what. I know I can do all things through Christ. Yes, I can make it in the desert, I can make it in the flood, I can make it.

Carri Richard: 12:42

He's 100% successful.

Ebony Gilbert: 12:44

Absolutely. That's good stuff. That's a good reference, good stuff. The thing about that verse I normally hone in on the I can do all things. I've learned that I can make it. But the part that resonates with me right now, in this moment, is I've learned. He had to matriculate through this thing Like it wasn't - I woke up and it just dropped in me and now I'm good. No, I had to learn this. There had to be some training, there had to be some practice, and now I can say that I've learned it.

Carri Richard: 13:21

Yes, I love that. It's all the way back to your point of how being amazed in 2023. Right, this isn't. This isn't. It's not quick fix. This is lifetime stuff.

Ebony Gilbert: 13:42

It's not - I recently, like last week, completed the coursework for a degree program I was going through and I did it because it was affordable and I guess I needed something to do. I don't know. But I went into it thinking I'm not going to learn a lot, this will just be some check boxes for me to get another degree on the wall.

Ebony Gilbert: 14:04

The stuff I have learned that is just part of conversation at work now, where I'm folding it into different conversations with people has been mind- blowing, and that wasn't even deliberate. So if I put a little bit of focus on learning, man, the things you can walk away from and they become part of your life this peace I talked about in the beginning I've learned that through the intentionality of us talking about it, through talking to Jesus, you know, like my prayers aren't just in morning and night, throughout the day, I'm like " hey, Carri, let's pray. Hey, let's, let's call in somebody to pray. Like it's so much more. It doesn't feel as weird. I was going to try to find a way to say it profoundly it just doesn't feel as strange.

Carri Richard: 14:52

I like. I like "it's not weird. Right, it's, it's not weird. It's not weird to me either. And you use the word learned and, as you were speaking, especially like with all the knowledge that you got for this degree program. It's that application. That's what transforms it into wisdom, or discernment, or perspective, or you know, whatever you want to call it. It's the application.

Ebony Gilbert: 15:27

Yes it is. yeah, I like that, I like that I like that. (Carri so I am 100% successful when I apply)

Carri Richard: 15:41

what grace is teaching me.

Ebony Gilbert: 15:45

Is it our responsibility to apply those teachings or is it just a bonus? What's the expectation with all this knowledge and wisdom? What's the expectation with this? Is it just for us to feel good and that's it?

Carri Richard: 16:01

Oh, that's a big question. That's a really big question, so I'm going to pick it apart. Do we have a responsibility to grace to apply it? Absolutely not. We do not. Grace is free all the time, no matter where we are.

Ebony Gilbert: 16:25

Okay.

Carri Richard: 16:30

Do we benefit from the application of it? Every time, every time. Now, if you speak of applying grace as giving grace to others, then we absolutely are responsible for that. We have a responsibility.

Ebony Gilbert: 16:53

So we don't have to do anything to get it necessarily? (Carri No, I don't think we can). We just got to be in the family - and we get to carry the name. Yeah, and then from there we decide.

Carri Richard: 17:15

(Ebony - Or not) yes.

Ebony Gilbert: 17:17

And studies.

Carri Richard: 17:18

And studies show, my life study shows when I freely share what I'm being given, everybody benefits.

Ebony Gilbert: 17:28

Does it benefit you?

Carri Richard: 17:32

It does Not always immediately. I just know from practice that it does.

Ebony Gilbert: 17:42

So let me ask you a question. We didn't prep for this question, so I'm putting you on the spot. Go with it, (Carri - that's fine). Have you ever freely shared it and it didn't feel good immediately? You felt drained? You felt like it took something out of you?

Carri Richard: 17:57

Yes, absolutely.

Ebony Gilbert: 18:01

How long do you wait before you say, okay, I'm bitter. Why did I do that? Like, does it correct itself along the way? What do you do with those situations where you're sharing and you're doing it for the good - there's no ill intent here involved and it doesn't feel good to you?

Carri Richard: 18:21

You know what. You know what? That's a great question. So what came to mind? I'm not going to get into the specific details or people, but somebody immediately came to mind and, just like Grace is available to me all the time, right, and I can accept it or be in the position to be open to it, or I can do this, I can block i it. If I'm giving grace to someone and they do this (block it), it never feels good. And I can keep doing it and I can keep getting this (block) and at some point, what brings me comfort right, wrong or indifferent is - I'm going to redirect this to someone else.

Carri Richard: 19:31

Because, exactly because it's. It's like a it's live. We talk about living waters. Right, it's a flow and it's like beating my head against a wall.

Ebony Gilbert: 19:46

I love it.

Carri Richard: 19:47

So yeah, that doesn't feel good.

Ebony Gilbert: 19:49

Yeah, you're right. I wouldn't have known to articulate it that way. But that's when it doesn't feel good, when you know it could go so much further. You know if it landed it'd be so much more effective. And it does not land because there's an arm up or there's a barrier.

Carri Richard: 20:04

And what was? Can I just say one quick thing? And sometimes, it's continuing to give grace because it's chipping away at a wall. It's not a one and done, it just depends. Does that make sense? The levee doesn't break after one rain. Right, but after 10, it might be time to kick the dust off your shoes and get to movin'.

Ebony Gilbert: 20:36

Yeah, so that's good, that's good. I'd like to think of this as kind of our year in review, kind of. We've been in the hall, we've had controlled burns, we've had grace glasses and I'm going to drop a plug here we're going to have a retreat in 2024. Yes, we are in March. We're going to do some stuff face to face.

Carri Richard: 21:02

Yeah, so if you all are interested, stay tuned. There's more to come and this is an opportunity to apply all of this in a very concentrated fashion in a very beautiful community and really have it serve as a catalyst for some amazing, amazing things in 2024.

Ebony Gilbert: 21:37

I'm excited, me too. All right, Carri, I think we did it. We did it.

Carri Richard: 21:45

Not alone. We did not do it alone.

Ebony Gilbert: 21:50

I'm not just talking about this podcast. We did 2023. We did it.

Carri Richard: 21:55

Successfully, absolutely.

Ebony Gilbert: 21:59

We love you. We're here for you. We want to hear from you. We'd love to see you in a few months. Until then, Grace out.

Speaker 1: 22:09

Grace out. Thank you so much for joining us. If you enjoyed this episode, please let us know. We love to hear from you and share it with a friend. Also, please be sure to subscribe so you're notified when a new episode is posted. We hope you're leaving with another pointer to grace, a new perspective that will light it up in your own life. Until next time, be well, be bold, be kind to yourself and be on the lookout.